~Sweet Surrender~

Happy Thursday! I've had this post saved for awhile & wanted to share...in case you need a reminder that God loves you & meets you where you are....These two precious children are a true testament to God's graciousness & blessing in my life!

What is it about sweet surrender that sounds like an oxymoron to me??? I guess the issue is control...right? If you surrender, you are relinquishing control. Part of that (a HUGE part) is scary, not sweet. This is what I know about me...I'm not spontaneous (wish I was!). I like (need) schedules, lists, and timelines...this is my way of mapping out my life...day to day, week to week...this is the element of predictability that I like (love!). Otherwise, I'm frazzled...anyone relate?? I'd rather handle things myself...even if it means doing this the hard way or long way...at least it's done the way "I" like it..or want it. Gosh...I'm sounding really anal. :P Am I a little stubborn? Yeah. A little obsessive? Um...(clearing my throat)...yes. Do I share my feelings easily? YES...I do! But, do I...most importantly, CAN I surrender those feelings? I'm talking about feelings of worry here...feelings of not knowing the outcome of something that I'm worrying about....feelings of uncertainty about something I'm worrying about....feelings of insecurity about worry....feelings of helplessness..due to worry. See a pattern? Ugh. WORRY. What is it they say? Worry is like a rocking chair...it gives you something to do, but never gets you anywhere. True. VERY true. And, the only way to transition out of worry is to surrender. I'm good at sharing feelings...we know that. But, I'm not good at surrendering. And, sharing is not surrendering. You can share your worries all day long and still be bound by the chains of them. I've been guilty of sharing my feelings and worries with the Lord, and then wondering WHY I do not feel comforted...or WHY have I not seen evidence of Him hearing me? Again, I shared. I didn't surrender. It's so different.

Friends, I'm telling you this because the Lord has been changing the landscape of my life over the past few months, and it has been one of the most stressful, scary, and uncertain times in my life. My issues with surrendering has made this all the more difficult. It's incredibly difficult for me to let go....and let God. SO much has happened that has been out of my control, and I've been taken aback by it all. I've been asking WHY? a lot these last few months. Now that I'm a few months in to this storm, I'm starting....just beginning...to see changes taking place, and I trust (although I'm still scared) that it's for the better...since I love Christ, and I DO desire His will for my life. I've made that clear...despite my issues with worry and faith. Recently, I was teaching the kids a lesson on quarreling, and this question stuck with me...."Are you willing to do what is right (surrender), and trust God with the results (no matter what they shall be)?

I want to say....that if the Lord is performing an overhaul in your life, I'm right there with you. I understand. Fortunately, for you and I both, Jesus meets us where we are....right in the middle of the darkest night..when we're looking around in disbelief at all that is taking place around you. I'm thanking Him for that! I am saying a prayer for you now....and, could you do the same for me?